how will i know if i meet the person i should marry

(Gue dapet dari forward email.. bagus kok isinya.. apalagi ditutup dengan 'wait until your heart and head agree)


The choice of a marriage partner should not be based on "I get a warm,wonderful feeling whenever we're together and I want to have that warmwonderful feeling forever, so let's go get married". Feelings, as we havediscussed, have no logic on their own. They need to be acknowledged, ofcourse, but they need considerable assistance from your brain.
Marriage means choosing the person you will spend the rest of your lifewith. This, as you may have guessed, is a very long time to spend with oneperson.
This person will live with you, eat meals with you, sleep with you, and goon vacation with you. More important yet, this person will share yourchildren. You need to choose wisely. The decision should not be made basedon feelings alone. You need to ask yourself some tough questions. Thedecisions have tobe made on solid considerations.
Will this person be a good partner? Is she mature enough to put her ownselfish desires aside to look out for what is best for the family? Is heprepared to be a good provider? What is his track record? Is he responsibleenough to get a good job and keep it?
Will this person be a good parent? Can you stand the thought of yourchildren turning out exactly like this person? They will, you know. Childrenspend a lot of time with their parents and consequently pick up many or mostof their parents'character traits. You had better like your spouse's traitsa lot because you will be seeing them again in your children.
If something were to happen to you, would you completely trust this person,alone, with the ask of raising and forming your children? This is not apleasant thought, but it is an important consideration. Not everyone dies ata ripe old age with great grandchildren gathered around the bed. Sometimes aparent dies and leaves young children! in the care of the other parent. Ifyou feel that you would need to be around to correct or lessen this person'sinfluence on your children, then you are considering the wrong person.
Does this person share your faith in God? God does not give us children sothat we can mold them into the coolest, most popular people in school. Ourjob is to get them to heaven. To do that, we need to raise them believing inGod. It is tough to do that if only one parent believes.
Saying "this is right and this is wrong, and I want you to ignore Mommyuntil you are thirty-five" does not work. Small children ask about eightskillion questions in a single day. The answers to those questions go a longway toward forming the kind of adults they will become. Who will beanswering thosequestions for your children?
Does this person you are marrying have sexual self-control? Single peoplesometimes have this idea that marriage is just some kind of lifelong sexfestival and that as long as they have each other, they will never betempted by other people. Wrong! There are many times in every marriage whenone partner or the other is sexually unavailable - illness, the last monthsof pregnancy, travel. There are also times when spouses, just get on eachothers' nerves.
At times like this, other people can seem very appealing. That can bedangerous, because there are plenty of very attractive people out there whoare willing to make them available to married men and women. Do you wantsomeone who has never said "no" to sex? If he is not good at saying "no" ateighteen, it won't be different at forty. Do you want to worry about whetheror not your spouse is being faithful?
These are very important questions, and if you are not comfortable with allof the answers, you should definitely not marry this person. None if this isto say that feelings play no role at all in a marriagedecision. You don't have to, "Well,I suppose that you would make a goodspouse and parent, so even though I don't particularly like you I guess I'llmarry you'. You need to be happy and excited about the prospect of spendingyour life with someone. Your brain however, must acknowledge that thisperson as a good catch.
Don't listen to your heart alone or your head alone.Wait until your heartand head agree.